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SUICIDE IS NOT THE ANSWER!
I am not going to start with statistics, or other information about why and how people commit suicide. People go through hardships in life, and if you think about it, life is not easy in any aspect.
You cost a pretty penny to be born – You are born wet and naked. As you saw the light of the day for the first time, your lungs inhaled air and you cried. Your first cry brought joy to everyone around you, especially to your caretakers. For five years of your life you have someone around. They are watching you, feeding and providing comfort to you as much as they have for themselves, if not more.
You think, therefore you are!
Sooner than expected you are a being with a mind of your own. As soon as you think, you feel the reality of your existence in this space and time. You think about sleeping time, playing time, studying time. You learn some likes and dislikes of your life, and you think about them too. You discover that you want to be loved.
Time flies. You question about your existence. You see yourself in comparison with others. Life has not been as good for you as it has been for others around you. Groups are formed. A complete sense of “not belonging” takes over your existence. You become rebellious at home. You disobey your parents, teachers, and eventually the law. You are controllable.
Sex comes into the picture!
Now you experience sex. You have faced two roads diverging. Both will take you into a path of uncertainty, and bring you back into the same path you had before. I will clarify this by stating that, before you have sex for the first time, you were more controllable. Yes, you were a teenager, and your hormones were unbalanced, but you were not the first teenager that ever existed, and your parents know well that this age group is the hardest one to deal with. It comes with the package. The body is changing both physically and mentally. At this time you have a conscious and a personality to develop. If you chose to develop your conscious side, the road would not diverge. You would have listened to your parents, and do as told. But once you had sex, you automatically chose to develop your personality side, the side that wants you to fit in at all cost into the popular group of friends, you will travel into the path of uncertainty, created by you in cahoots with your group. Only among your pears you feel social adequacy. It is missing home adequacy.
Sex among teens can be influenced by peer pressure, drugs, alcohol, pot, parties, etc. The path of uncertainty starts with an infatuation. At this time, the entire consciousness has been shut off. Let me remind you that personality develops as consciousness shrinks. They are the opposite. You can not have both at full array. As a personality person, you start to take care of your body physically, and want to show it off, as if this is the most gorgeous thing you will ever have, and it will remain the same forever. See here that a touch with reality has vanished, and this is why this path is dark. Jealousy comes into play immediately after sex. Battles are fought between girls for one guy who plays with both at the same time. Usually no one blames the guy. Other battles are fought among peers who feel alienated or undesirable. Personality people want attention. They crave for admiration and sell themselves to satisfy a lust that only sex will remediate.
Parents lose control of their teens!
Once sex got into the picture, school became secondary, new friends are on the horizon, drugs are at play and personality people are together socializing while playing the blame game. Priorities have been changed, and parents have not a clue how to modify it. Parents forgot that their children copy what they see outside when they miss it inside their home.
Most people use their personality phase for about fifteen years of their existence, and then shift into consciousness for the remaining of their lives. It is very important to have a good personality because it attracts others into your realm of existence, as it is very important to be an individual. When you balance both, you live a full life with love for others and a sense respect for their individuality. It is not as important to be important, as it is important to be good to others.
When teens are getting in trouble, parents need to intervene immediately. But remember. You are to be blamed! Start with apologizing for not being there when it started, and give the teen a chance to explain how it all begun. Embrace your child’s problem as yours and fight with your child to overcome. Not against your child. It doesn’t mean picking up a fight with others either. It means to find out what personality phase your child is experiencing. Has drugs been involved, has sex been a part of it? It is infatuation?
Stay closer to your teen and monitor every friend and conversation. This is your obligation. Check phone, text messages, school bag, etc. to find out what little person you are being responsible for. Until your child is 18 you have the obligation to educate, discipline, control and participate. This is a mission you have with life. Ask for help, find help.
One to Blame
Everyone has something or someone to blame for their problems in life. We start with our parents and the way they educated us. Either we come from a broken home, or a dysfunctional family, or divorced parents, or from an orphanage, we always will hang on something to justify our choices in life, and therefore blame it for. When we can not do it, others will do it for us. It is very convenient to find others to blame. It is time to stop this cycle. It is old and passé.
Now you are going to have a baby!
You are only a teen! What to do? The baby is your brother’s baby. The baby has no father. The father doesn’t want the baby. Oh Gosh! You have a problem in your hands. What to do? For starters, you have a home. You have parents and you have a family that you abandoned. You feel all alone. Remember that you abandoned them but they do not you. They hate your actions because of their love for you. If they truly dislike you, they would not care and you would not be worried about them. Now the damage has been made, and it is time to clean up the mess. Take responsibility and share with your guardians your problem. Be honest, and you will be set free of this worry. Reveal what is happening and for one time face life as it is, and not as you have created in your head. To have a baby while teen is not a big deal. It happens every day people have sexual intercourse without protection. The problem will be after birth. Are you going to create a person the way you were created? Are you going to rear with discipline? What are you going to do? Well, you are faced with the same challenges expressed in the beginning of this post. The solution is to talk with an adult. The gift of life is never a problem.
Now you are hooked on drugs!
Wow, it must be terrible, for you need money to buy it and you may not have. At least you will not overdose. But kidding aside, drugs are a drag. The high once acquired will never return, but the search for the same high will remain. Free base is not free, for it can cost you a house, family, friends and even yourself. Drugs are depressant, and sooner or later you will be depressed. Only another shot will put you back in track, or so you think, and this way you are killing yourself one day at a time, and leaving traces of disagreements and unhappiness among everyone you touch. Most addicts commit crimes. The end is in a cell or on rehabilitation facilities. Drug is not a solution, but it is there and you need to learn to live with it, and not be a part of it. Most addicts have a family. They come from some place; they were somebody else one time. Drugs changed them, and we need to accept the fact that this force was greater than his force to resist. We need to extend a hand and offer help. In other words, addiction is bad, but it can be cured only with love and care.
Love Triangle!
If involved in a love triangle, get out! I know you can not hear me, but this is the worse love situation a human being can get exposed to. It always has bad ramifications. Not long ago, only guys used to go after girls for sex, but nowadays, it is the opposite. Girls will do whatever they can to have sex with guys. There are girls who are popular in school because they use boy’s restrooms to give anyone who is interested a blow job. You can not imagine how creative teens are nowadays. They are aggressive towards sex, and when infatuated, no one can change it. They will have sex at all cost. In most love triangle, one guy usually plays with two girls mind until a fight occurs between the girls, who for stupid reason, hate one another and compete for the same guy. It has to do with sex. Usually, in a love triangle parties involved are not aware that they are not the only ones, but when they know about the third person, they enjoy the secrecy and practicing sex with more intensity. Secrecy can make sex very intense, therefore partners continue in a love triangle for as long as it is not known by the third party. Once it comes out, the girls are the ones to suffer. Do not ask me why, but in most love triangle where two girls fought for one guy, they never blamed the guy. Yet, he was the main reason why they were in that place to begin with. Love triangle usually happens when couples decide to try something else, and end up agreeing in having a threesome, but later, one party can not disconnect from the other. While it is a secret, love making takes its toll and both party feel in love. Off course, they are in love with their lives in that present moment, while sex is good and the conversation is light. But not in love enough to the point of being honest and come clean. An affair with bad consequences is about to happen. Everyone will be hurt. Love triangle can and has ended in tragedy. If you are involved in a love Triangle, just remember that you are up to deception. Chances are you a more personality person than consciousness person, and you let your personality take over your life, making it impossible to love with full array of human emotions. Your love is not real. It feels real, but it is an obsession. It is a drug and you are addicted to it. You become blind and the only remedy is to remove this person from your system. True love comes with responsibility. It comes with truthfulness of who you are in relation to the person you love. It means that you are honest and sincere about your feelings. You respect the other being as you want to be respected. This is love. The rest is obsession, confusion, lust, and lack of love. My advice is: Do not be cruel. Do not through it out there for everyone to talk about. Be discrete, end the relationship and relate where you are with your partner. Be honest and ask for help in find out if what you really feel is love or if it is something else. I know it is something else, but you need to have this doubt to start the process of seeing it more clearly. Once it is not a secret, you have a choice or a choice will be presented to you. If you slept with your brother’s wife, it also can be fixed. It took two to do it, and off course, alcohol and whatever was involved. Again, it is something that makes who you are, and you can not ignore the fact that others depend upon you, therefore you need to be clean, and face the consequences. We are all humans and we all make mistakes. No mistake is greater enough to prevent a bigger force to dissipate.
In this life you have a choice!
It is easy for me to say that a person who contemplates suicide has been placed in a predicament. However, it is not easy for me to distinguish whether this predicament is mental or physical. Physical is easier to fix, for it involves money, betrayal, shame, sickness in the family, lost of a loved one or a child, or lost of something as big as a career, status, fame etc. Mental, on the other hand is not easy to fix, for it involves lack of desire to live, medical depression and social inadequacy.
Our brain is responsible for our moods. When you are happy, you feel and act happy and when you are sad we feel and act sad. There are many factors that can make you sad, but usually there are more factors that make you happy. For example: you have a life and you can create great things for others while you are here. You can have a family of our own, you can enjoy a warm bath, you can drive, etc. You are free to do many things. If your brain only brings sad thoughts, you need to see a doctor, who will prescribe a small dosage of medication to your brain that would balance chemically your brain fluids and present you with a moderate mood. When depressed, you lose your physical desire to move. Depression alone can make you have suicidal thoughts, but you can conquer it by taking proper medication. First and foremost, tell a doctor or a suicidal hotline how you feel, and if it is a medical depression, you can be treated. Remember that not all brains can produce serotonin in normal quantity for one to function and face reality with eyes wide open. Take your medication and take one day at a time.
Our body responds to our mood, therefore one thing is connected to the other, except that a depression caused because you lost a child or your money is normal to a certain extent. Our brain will not produce a chemical that makes you happy when you are going through sorrows. It would make you crazy if it produced stamina when you need to be calm and in touch with reality. If you were exposed to faith when you were a child, you would overcome the death of a loved one with less trouble. You would understand that your life is precious and that you are protected by many laws that prevent others of causing you harm, to the point where you walk on streets knowing that no one will shoot you just because. You have a certainty of security, but you can not stop others of making their choices, as no one can stop you of making yours. Lives are important, and while you are contemplating suicide, remember that many people will be affected if you go through with it. For starters, they will question for generations why such and such person committed suicide? What could I have done to prevent it? Why we did not see it? Who is going to marry his children, knowing that they may have tendencies to do the same? Whose fault was it? Was it his mother or his Estranged father? What took him to actually do it? Was it mental? …and the list goes on for many years to come. Then, families will suffer, separate, change sides and start a war among them with the blame game. I do not think it is worth it. To take one’s life for a physical reason is a very selfish way of departure. It is to let the others deal with the situation, as long as you leave some money. This is selfish because you are here to live a life and set examples to others to do the same. You are here to face your problems and resolve them. Cut your losses and live in poverty, but live with dignity. It is even more selfish when one contemplates murder and suicide. It means complete disconnection with others, lack of empathy and lack of divinity. It means that this human being has never felt empathy for anyone. This is not physical.
To summarize, suicide is not the answer because you are a million pieces. Your family gave you love from the first moment you were born. You have others who depend on you. You are loved by many people and your life is very important for the country, which would place in jail anyone who would harm you. You are important for everyone you have been in touch with, and if you were not here, many people’s life will take different turns because of you, who could guide, or direct or even be a friend when they needed you the most. Your departure will cause an effect greater than your imagination can reflect. It will affect everyone’s life, from the person who hears the news to the person who participates in your life. It will be a tragedy for all human beings to know that together no one could prevent it. Your life will have an end only for you. Others will suffer and be tempered for their entire life.
From the moment you thought about suicide, you realized that you are tired or upset or disgusted with life. It is a normal feeling, for no one is happy and dandy all life. This is the reason we have one day after the other. Every day is a new beginning. If life was a parallel with no days and no nights, and time would not pass, then it would be terrible, but life is not this way. Life is taking one day at a time. Life is hard and costly, but we can manage to exist. We make friends to help us in desperate times. You have helped many people in your life even not knowing them. Face the music! Dance. But please, do not end your life short.
I have heard many things about people that take their own lives.
1- They are insane
2- They went bankrupt
3- They lost something
Others use a different approach and say:
1- They worth more dead than alive
2- They were not prepared for this or for that
3- They could not surpass depression
It doesn’t matter what is bothering you, it will come to pass. We have one day after the other with new opportunities. Whatever the problem is, for one minute let me help you. I will listen to you and I will help you to find a solution. I just want to be your eyes and ears for one minute to comprehend what is taking you to this ultimatum sacrifice.
